May
2008
Salem, Oregon seeks Interventionist insight.
Once an addict or alcoholic always and addict or alcoholic?
This morning I woke up to an email that was sent from my website during the middle of the night. It was a woman in Salem, Oregon who wanted to know if her husband was always going to be an alcoholic. For the confidentiality purposes of this post we will call her RH.
RH has been married for 10 years now to a practicing alcoholic who has recently gone to treatment. RH is concerned that when her husband returns from rehabilitation she will not be able to go drinking with him ever again. RH wants to know if her husband will always drink alcoholically.
That’s a very good question and I will do my best to help you understand what your husband is up against. I have seen, heard, and read some very convincing arguments on both sides of this issue. Some say that addiction is a learned behavior and it can be unlearned. Others say its genetic and you can work it out with therapy and others say its a physiological disorder and it cant be undone . I was taught in college that chemical dependency is a bio-social-psycho disease that needs to be treated with a multi-disciplinary treatment approach (I always liked the way that perception sat with me). I have rarely seen a man (or woman) who has hit some type of social or emotional bottom as a result of substance abuse that has just been able to pick up and control it (I have actually never seen that happen). I just use the word rarely because I am sure someone will be able to serve up an exception to this rule. The problem with going to treatment and then coming home and trying it again is that in order to find out if you really have a problem or not you will have to unleash the beast again and who know how and when that might end.
RH, I am sorry if this is not the insight you might have been looking for. I hope that you can find the courage to see your husbands step to get help as a gift.
